Things I have to say
1)I'm not Moler...I changed my name.
2)I know what sarcasm is, but you've taken this to the extreme.
3)I still think you've become crazy from all this.
Thats all
If you must touch the dragon, just be wary. It'll bite your hand off.
Evil Kitty: Dad! Der be a snow man out threah!
Ma: Oh my Jesus! It gonna git ma boy!
Pa: Don' worry, Villie! I gonna git ma shot gun and blow it ter smitherans!
*click* *BOOM!*
Evil Kitty: You go done kill ma snowman, pappa!
Pa: That'll teach yer, you snow-bastard! Try'n kill ma boy? SALTED NUTS!
Evil Kitty: But I made it, pa!
Pa: It'll turn on yeh, boy! Just like ma grandpappy did back in 1825! He go done ate old Muley! Bleerguh!
Ma: That right, my grandpappy did the same!
Pa: He wer both our grandpappy! Youse ma sister, remember!
Ma: But I also yer mother!
Pa: Yeah, but I'm yer great grand pappy!
Evil Kitty: Why'd have ter be ma snowman!
Ma: If you wasn't my brothur, I'd beat yer!
Pa: FIDDLESTICKS!
Fine Garbage since 2003.
CURRENT PROJECT:
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His Pappy don' wan him teh get his leg blowed up and replaced wit a beaver like he did. See, down south you don't gots them fancy docters, so you gots to make do with what you gots. Mmmhmmm.
Edited by the Author.
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Deleted User
8th December, 2005 at 18:16:41 -
Hey I shot it two. HE shot it first Because I had to film
It weren't beggin' fer death! It were beggin' fer a new fiddle, but pappy said "I anien't givin you no new fiddle, snow! Git off ma property our I'll shoot yer!" And so the snowman tried ter take Evil Kitty hostage, threatin' to beat im' wit a carrot-stick. So pappy shot it, blowin' its evil head to bits, jus' like Uncle Hickus did in 1779 when the Great Piggy War broked out.
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Yer Great-Grandmama had an affair wit yer brother/uncle Spickty! I sawed it! But Great Uncle Hickus was sleepin' wit yer Great-Grandmama's pig Vivian! She gots three piglets that look jus' like im'. But that's how the Great Piggy War started! Is' true! Yer Great Uncle Spickty found out der truth, so he rangled up a possy to fight yer Uncle Hickus and his possy! But yer Uncle Hickus' cow Viola gots mortally wounded in the Battle of Piglet's Pass! Yer pappy never told you this, seein' as how it was yer faviourte cow, but yer Great Uncle Scrumpy was the one who shot the cow! Mmmhmm.
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Just cause' yer a redneck don't mean you anien't Christian, boy! Didn't yer ever hear yer Great Aunt Shmempty say that! She was prayin' up a storm, but then you go done intrupt her so that you could start playin' that infernal banjo! She got crazy as a bull on tuesday!She go done near beat yer to you was black and blue like what happen to yer cousin Vepty when he tempted that ragin' sheep! Boy, he looked like a cactus in the middle of winter!
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CURRENT PROJECT:
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-Working in television.
I's tellin yer, youse gots to have a showdown with yer Great Uncle Scrumpy! Fer the cows, you must do it! If not, yer just gonna dwell on the past, and that aint healthy, yall. Fight im', boy, or he'll just kill more cows!
And then yer pappy can be truly proud of you! He'll celibrate by goin' to git drunk and then beatin up yer Great Grandpappy like he did in 1855. Those were the days! Ham and Sasauge as far as the eye could see!
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Evil Kitty@
1)Yes, you are too from the south
2)How many times have I told you not to get into religeous discussions????
Jesus Clause@
Thats a little over the edge
If you must touch the dragon, just be wary. It'll bite your hand off.
Deleted User
9th December, 2005 at 07:49:03 -
@silverdrake Im not that down south Only VA. Stop telling me not to get into relegus
disoustions Your acting like my Parents
@Jesus claws This is what happed
Evil kitty:Hey dad Will you shoot A snowman.
Dad:Sure son Come and get me when your done Makeing it.
Evil kitty:Sure DAD
Some time later...
Evil kittyK dad Im ready
DADk come On.
1 min later.
*click* Bang
Evil kittyAD I did't get it on film.
Evil kitty makes atother one.
DAD and evil kitty go out this time DAD brout A 2 shell for Evil kitty.
*Click* boom
Evil kitty:That time I got it DAD.
Evil kitty Takes that shotgun and shoots the snowman
Then Goes Inside and gets a Wood stick
Then goes Out and beats the remains Of the snowman
Then goes Inside and plays need for speed most wanted.
The End
Deleted User
9th December, 2005 at 08:23:58 -
Fine
Deleted User
9th December, 2005 at 08:38:26 -
Sorry I can't Do the red Snowman today I was suposed to get A lot of snow today but alll I got was ice.
I'm tellin' you, boy, that anit what happened! Mmmhrrmm! Didn't yer Great Uncle Pamps ever tell you nothin'? "Ne're lie!" Those be his werds! And all youse do is shun em'! Makin' dirty fibs, boy! You gots to stop it, boy! Yer gonna make God kill yer crops, an then yer Pappy won't be makin' no profit!
Great Uncle Pamps felt his birthmark on his knee start a-wigglin' and singing the 'America My Country Tis' Of Thee' and you all know what that means: A STORMS A BREWIN'! MEATLOAF!
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Yerrrp, you shoulda seen your Great-Great Grandpappy Gumple do it! He grabbed that son a bitch and blasted two warnin' shots before using yer pappy's beaver leg to chew away at the snowmans wooden arms! Yerrrp! Those'r the days! That was the same year yer Great Uncle Clavis started butchering his own children to make chilli! Times were tough, and yer had to do what yer had to do! Clavis was a gewd man married to a gewd women who bared 25 children (inculdn' two who had pigsfeet, cause' he had been sleepin' wit the same piggy! All them kids were sure nice, and yer Auntie tried to stop em' from eatin em'! But yer Aunt Chavis didn't stop em' from whackin' his kids with a greased-up pigglet! Iz true! He go done blast em', and they twitched like a chicken without a head! S'true! He stewed em' up like yer Great-Great-Great-Great Grandma did back in 1778, only that was with two Eskimos cause' she anit' likin eskimos to much, ya see. Yerrp, ripped em' right outta their lil' egg glues and beat em' to death with two tons of ham! Yer Uncle HAVSK, (who was also yer brother, great uncle, great-great-great-grandpappy, and yer great-great-great grandmaw) tried to stop er', but she hated em' cause he was Jewish, so she grabbed a load of panda lard and slathered him up in it before sayin' the magic words 'Osta Osta FIDDLE STICKS!' which caused all the Indian Babies to eat all the creamed corn in the entire state! HAMSTEAK!
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Yer Great Uncle Spitzy made that same eye-bally face, Tiddlywinks! Yes, I know that's yer name, Digital Dreams, yer always known by the same name when you grow up in a town like ours! I knows yer a city folk now, goin' on this fancy DC, but you should still find time for yer Great, Great, Great Grandpappy Vippy, shouldn't yer? Anyway, ol' Spitzy gave me the same look as I told em' all about yer travels to the old mill back in TN, you know, the one that produces little sugar packets? Yep, told em' all bout' how you took down that damned demon squirrel! Yeeeesury! He was mighty shocked- you wasn't much a fighter when you was a boy, no sir, you were beaten up by Old Lady Mackentire, remember! Don't be ashamed, she was a nasty old gal, but she was beaten down one day in the summer of 1892 by a chicken-gone-sour! Yep, that ol' chicken was mean as could be- nearly tore my other eye out with it, then I'd be blind in both eyes! But I beat it over the head with a piece of year-old mutton leg! Yesssiry, yer grandmama thought it was crazy o' me to go done carry that rotten-mutton around, but I knewed it would come to use one day! Saw it in a vision back in 1902! Yessir, a giant clam told me to carry a rotten mutton around, and I did! Damn near made me iller then a chicken with sour crop, but I did use it, didn't I? Anyway, he was so amazed that you beat down that demon squirrel with that musty old piece of ham- take after yer grandpappy, yessir!- he was so suprised that he blew his eye balls out! They flew cross county and landed in some little girls ice-cream! Yessir! CREAMED CORN!!!
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Points 185
9th December, 2005 at 22:41:19 -
Anyone else skip over Lazarus's posts?
"Isn't it always amazing how we characterize a person's intelligence by how closely their thinking matches ours?"
~Belgarath
Peblo, did I ever tell you bout' the time yer Great Grandmama Papass go done have went off with old Cooky? Yerp, she got the hots for his flap-jack-makin' ablities. Yesery, so they went done go off and *EDIT* with a *EDIT* *EDIT* so that they *EDIT* stick *EDIT**EDIT*EDIT* yeeehawww! She said, so *EDIT* *EDIT* EDIT* and he was using flapjacks to slap her hine-quarters! You shoulda heard the sqealin', sounded like a load o' pigs! So that's how they had yer brother, Cooky JR, but he was killed in the Great War of 1910 when them damned Indians go done kill all the crops! Cooky was wounded in battle (he got struck with an arrow through his throat). So he stuck onea his flapjacks inside the bleedin' wound, and it absorbed the blood like a spondge! Wooowee! His pancakes were good for more then eatin' and slappin' thighs! And that's how Moochie saved Christmas!
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Don' you run from me, boy! I's gonna rip you limb from limb jus' like yer Great Granny Pappers did in 1874! She rip yer Great, Great Uncle Buxly into shreads and fed im' to her own kids! Yesir, but she was fed to a wolf 'erself back in the cold summer of 69'! Took a whole pack of im' to kill er', but the point is, she dead, and there aint nothing you can do! Don't blame yerself boy, you was busy making stuffed walrus' down at the old petting Zoo.
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Deleted User
13th December, 2005 at 07:39:21 -
Uhhhhhhh ok your wierd *hops in plane and flys far far away.
Yer better not hop a train, Missy! Or ye'll end up like Pirate McClaggen! Arrrg! He was the saltyst of the Sea dogs, but like any peanut, he started to grow stale, and that's when they jucked em' off the dark ship The Peacock! It was terrible! Tie em' to the brig, Johnson! And bring me tea with a lemon twist!
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Deleted User
14th December, 2005 at 07:46:05 -
OK ur really wierd *Bang* *click* *Shoots you with a gun*
*and then hops in plane and runs for his life*
Personally I don't have a problem with hunting, however here are some reasons:
1) Hunters kill helpless animals.... Although this wouldn't be THAT bad but some hunters are so retarded/drunk that they don't actually "kill" the animal but just wound it.... This causes the animal to run off into the woods to die a slow, painful, pointless death.
2) Hunters are so retarded, they don't know they can go to the grocery store to get meat.
3) Hunters are so dumb that sometimes they manage to kill themselves with their own guns.
4) Hunters are so stupid that they manage to sometimes shoot OTHER people with their guns.....
5) Going into the woods for the purpose of killing something is retarded...
Well, it derpends on what kind o' pornography it is, yesir. Normal people like thems pretty girls wit all the fixin's, but then there be weirdos who like kitties, like yer Great Great Uncle Floxin. Oh yesir, Great Great Uncle Floxin had a giant kitty farm filled with kitties of all shapes n' colours! Fancy colours too! And they was all naked! You remember that, don't yer, son? Yes, that was a golden year fer the family, 1888! I remember it as if it were yesterday, son! We was all on the Kitty Farm watchin' Great Great Uncle Floxin go after one o' them lil' fancy chinese kitties (he was always partial to thems, ya know). So then, you says to him 'Go git em', Uncle!' You was only a little feller then, yesir! I remember that day! You was wearin' one o' them lil' silk dresses with yor red clown makeup on! You were wearing a mink-skin fur coat over that, and yer name was Mavis. So Uncle says to you, he says: "Mavis, fetch me one o' them Chinese cats! I's to old to catch em' meself!' So you says 'Kay, Uncle!' So you got a hold o' them little cats, and he had his way with em', but the sad part is he had a heart attack from it! Yesir, he was to old to be doin' them things. So he died, but his son (yer Great Uncle Chavis) countinued the cat-lovin' legacy and had three cat-children with yer Great Aunt Meowy (she's a cat, you know?) So these three kids were called freaks! Do you believe that, kid? Yesir, so yer Uncle Chavis sold all three of em' to the circus. One of em' was eaten alive by the bearded lady (she was chinese, ya see?) The second one committed sucide by takin' a giant helibet and beatin' himself dead. The third one grew to the ripe old age of seven, and then he was attacked by some crazy knife-weildin' Frenchman who shouted some fancy french stuff, and fed it horrible explodin' eclaires. He was found in bits, ya see.
So the important thing is you tried, son.
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"Retarded" has a D in it... and "Christian" has an I in it, for that matter. I'd start on the huge amount of ignorance that saying "not being a Christian is dumb" shows, but as your age isn't in double figures yet I think I'll let it past.
Dude's, don't you know? We're all the big G-Man's entertainment. I'm sure he laughed his ass off at that snowman.
I just hope we don't get cancelled.
Craps, I'm an old man!
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Points 185
17th December, 2005 at 18:30:39 -
Wong: Kitty said a few pages back he was almost 13, making him 12, which is a double digit. I still can't believe Evil Kitty's older than me.
Kitty: 'uB3|21337 |*]-[122%' has no association with porn in any way.
Laz: Everyone can laugh at religion, but there is a line of blasphemy that if you cross, some members will turn the topic into another religious debate.
Shab: Then what would there be to watch? Stars?
"Isn't it always amazing how we characterize a person's intelligence by how closely their thinking matches ours?"
~Belgarath
Deleted User
17th December, 2005 at 18:58:54 -
Laz @ Actully jeaus died and came back to life! Go Jeaus!
Hayo @Your saying im gonna shoot every thing inclueing myself.
mosses@I know I wanted to let phizzy know because he really likes something agaist the law and god!
Navid newton@ Thanks for leting it pass.
Everyone@ thank you for getting me a little good rep becaue of the snowman.
Hunters are fucking scum. Any bastard who kills something he PERCEIVES to be below himself deserves to be skinned alive. I'd happily volunteer to do it.
I'd love to see your dad take on a brown bear without his precious gun, yeeha motherfucker, I'd pay to see that.
Leave the animals, kill each other.
By a route obscure and lonely,
Haunted by ill angels only,
Where an Eidolon, named night,
On a black throne reigns upright,
I have reached these lands but newly
From an ultimate dim Thule
From a wild clime that lieth, sublime,
Out of space
Out of time.
Deleted User
17th December, 2005 at 21:29:54 -
Ur wierd
Deleted User
17th December, 2005 at 21:34:16 -
Ok ur a crazy guy
Deleted User
17th December, 2005 at 21:46:51 -
there is a lot of prof that what the book says is true.
p.s phizzy wgat is ur riligon?
@Novasoft: I think hunting is fine as long as you eat what you kill.
@Peblo: I didn't 'cross the line'. Saying Jesus was a hunter wasn't offensive unless your a crazy baptist.
@Evil Kitty: Check yer Bible boy, 'Jesus' isn't spelled with an 'A'.
This is getting stupid. I'm going to go skin a beaver.
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About Phizzy: He's not a christian. He started his own cult of 'Phizzalians' (kind of like Raliens or Scientoligists)he brainwashes them, and forces them to buy his odd merchandise.
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Evil Kitty is one of the last people on earth who should be trusted with a gun.
My God, a violence-loving, Christian, proselytizing tween. Damn, that's new. If you're so religious, I'd love to see the reasoning behind "Ultimate Death." What would He think of virtual genocide?
"Omg. Where did they get the idea to not use army guys? Are they taking drugs?" --Tim Schafer on originality in videogames
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Points 185
17th December, 2005 at 22:34:14 -
Well Laz, you never know when a crazy baptist will show up on TDC. If your a crazy baptist, raise your hand!
"Isn't it always amazing how we characterize a person's intelligence by how closely their thinking matches ours?"
~Belgarath
Deleted User
17th December, 2005 at 22:46:15 -
IM not a crazy baptist!
Deleted User
17th December, 2005 at 22:48:10 -
And im not violence loving I hate it in real life
Deleted User
18th December, 2005 at 12:17:17 -
Phizzy you never met me in real life!
Deleted User
18th December, 2005 at 12:20:59 -
Phizzy you think that way over a million people are crazy?
@Axel: I tried that, but it didn't help.
@Evil Kitteh: There is proof?
I actually don't really have a religion, and I dislike organized religions. I don't have anything against religious people, but faith should be personal, and how can it be personal in a church with all those folks around you and a preacher telling you what to believe?
Hmm... While reading this I felt my IQ go down a few points.... I really did .
meh when in rome "omg i wuv u guys u teh best and ct is so 1337 omg lols"
A bit of insanity with every bite!
Peblo Custom ratings must be 50 characters or less
Registered 05/07/2002
Points 185
19th December, 2005 at 03:24:08 -
I'm one of those weird mormons.
I sorta know enough to defend the bible, but then someone like Radix or Trever will come along, counter the few points I made, and make me look stupid when I can't counter. So I'll just stand over here and watch. Besides, us mormons think that the bible was translated so many times that it has corrupted parts that we need to skip over, or something.
"Isn't it always amazing how we characterize a person's intelligence by how closely their thinking matches ours?"
~Belgarath
"I actually don't really have a religion, and I dislike organized religions. I don't have anything against religious people, but faith should be personal, and how can it be personal in a church with all those folks around you and a preacher telling you what to believe?"
You could always try satanism.
"In satanism you don't have a god - you're your own god"
Besides, us mormons think that the bible was translated so many times that it has corrupted parts that we need to skip over, or something.
Well, the KJB translation that a lot of western xtianity is based on is really badly done. So in that sense there's a lot of random invalid stuff floating around (unicorns are a famous example).
Still, isn't that an odd position for mormonism? A religion that's based on supposed translations from golden plates that nobody's ever seen, and that have had the details subtly changed at least a dozen times when holes emerge?
n/a
Peblo Custom ratings must be 50 characters or less
Registered 05/07/2002
Points 185
19th December, 2005 at 16:51:50 -
I havn't heard that the details were changed at all in the translation, but yes, it is rather strange that we base our religion of of something no one's seen. That's when we're supposed to let faith kick in, and then we have a working religion. That's all I can go off of right now, the teachers don't expect that the kids they teach are going into some debate or anything. They give us enough information so we can comprehend the stories in the books, not nessessarily why they are true. They teach that when you're in highschool though. Give me two years and I'll be there.
"Isn't it always amazing how we characterize a person's intelligence by how closely their thinking matches ours?"
~Belgarath
Well, see what happens is every time something comes up that contradicts the original mormon texts, they're quietly 'corrected' by the church. Which goes entirely against the whole point of the divine translation scam.
n/a
Peblo Custom ratings must be 50 characters or less
Registered 05/07/2002
Points 185
19th December, 2005 at 17:47:03 -
Well, what has been quietly 'corrected'?
"Isn't it always amazing how we characterize a person's intelligence by how closely their thinking matches ours?"
~Belgarath
This topic is insane. It goes from a hillbilly snowman shooting rampage to an insane redneck conversation, and now (as Peblo predicted) it is a debate about religion!
Okay, no offense to Peblo, but this is my opinion about Mormonism:
Pros
-The families on the whole are happy (except for that one crazy Mormon guy who lived in a trailer. He forced his children, family, and wife to inbreed, and then he killed them all and had a shoot out with police from his Mobil home) <--and yes, that's a true story.
Cons:
Joseph Smith was either a genius, an idiot, or a prophet. If he was a genius, it's because he
A) Screwed a bunch of people into believing that he had talked to an angel who told him that Jesus came to North America where a bunch of evil white people lived, and that he turned their skin red because he was angry at them.
B)Screwed a bunch of people into believing he had two golden plates that to this day no one other then Smith himself has seen
C)That the stones changed several times because God was angry at them, even though the real reason was because he either forgot what he had said or that he had changed them to fit what he wanted at that time.
He was an idiot because he:
A)Believed that he had talked to an angel who told him that Jesus came to North America where a bunch of evil white people lived and that he turned their skin red because he was angry at them.
B) translated two amazing gold plates that were from God himself.
And if he was a prophet, which I highly doubt, then I'm screwed because I don't believe a word of his story.
Again, I'm just giving you my opinion, Peblo. I respect you and your faith, and I hope I didn’t alienate you.
My views on Baptists:
They're Fking nuts. Anybody can found a Baptist church and call themselves ministers. They’re like Evangelists. All that ‘Shout, SHOUT, PRAISE EM’, HOOYUH!’ stuff is creepy. I have a Baptist church down the street from me, and it’s a cult. They’re scary. There are tons of Baptist cults (including several infamous ones).
Scientologists:
Don't even get me started. These people are so incredibly stupid. They believe in Xenu, the evil alien guy who committed alien genocide by sending them to Earth, tossing them into a volcano, and then sending them out to torment people. They're the biggest scam ever. They own loads of front companies (including the NEOPETS company). L Ron Hubbard, the creator of this 'religion' said: They best way to make loads of money is to create your own religion.' That gives it all away. He claims his Sci-fi books are real. He was dirty rotten pedophile too.
Moonies:
They're all nuts who think that some Asian guy is the new Messiah.
Satanisim:
These people are stupid. This is the most lazy religion out there.
Mmmyep.
P.S. Evil Kitty: Remember, boy, don't go playin' with muskets again like yer great great grandpappy Hendrix did. Damn near blew yer left ear off when you was a kid, remember that? Went right through yer skull, missin' yer ear by inches! But it's okay: them brain-doctors replaced the left side of yer brain with a beaver brain! Mmmyerrp!
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Peblo Custom ratings must be 50 characters or less
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Points 185
19th December, 2005 at 20:04:31 -
I only know some answers and counter examples to those points, but not all them because
a) I've not been taught enough
b) I'm hardly a representative of the church
I can hardy compete with your points, but I'll stick with my opinions until I can get answers to my questions.
"Isn't it always amazing how we characterize a person's intelligence by how closely their thinking matches ours?"
~Belgarath
There's a strong philosophy (put foward originally by christian philosophers, interestingly) that you need to question your faith in order to truly embrace it. If you ignore criticisms, rather than researching and overcoming them, you aren't a 'real' christian/raelian/brogmoidist/whatever.
@Evil Kitty: Dad! Der be a snow man out threah!
Ma: Oh my Jesus! It gonna git ma boy!
Pa: Don' worry, Villie! I gonna git ma shot gun and blow it ter smitherans!
*click* *BOOM!*
Evil Kitty: You go done kill ma snowman, pappa!
Pa: That'll teach yer, you snow-bastard! Try'n kill ma boy? SALTED NUTS!
Evil Kitty: But I made it, pa!
Pa: It'll turn on yeh, boy! Just like ma grandpappy did back in 1825! He go done ate old Muley! Bleerguh!
Ma: That right, my grandpappy did the same!
Pa: He wer both our grandpappy! Youse ma sister, remember!
Ma: But I also yer mother!
Pa: Yeah, but I'm yer great grand pappy!
Evil Kitty: Why'd have ter be ma snowman!
Ma: If you wasn't my brothur, I'd beat yer!
Pa: FIDDLESTICKS! @
This movie is highly anticipated by the mentally retarded.
Edit: How could I forget to add this song:
Sometimes, the world is black.
And tears run from your eyes.
And maybe we'll all get really sick.
And maybe we'll all die.
So...
Let's build a snowman!
We can make him our best friend.
We can name him Tom or we can name him George!
We can make him tall, or we can make him not so tall.
Snowman!
He'll have a happy face, a happy smile, a happy point of view.
If you build me a snowman, then I'll build one for you.
So, let's build a snowman!
We can make him our best friend.
We can name him Bob or we can name him Beowulf!
We can make him tall, or we can make him not so tall.
Snowman!
Hey!
(Tapdance solo)
He'll have a happy face, a happy smile, a happy point of view.
If you build me a snowman, then I'll build one for you.
Snowman! Snowman! Snowman!
Edited by the Author.
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CURRENT PROJECT:
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This time I will color the inside red... Shot=blood every where
Edited by the Author.
K dad Im ready
